You just couldn't resist could you?
I had so much going on, what with the re-mortgage, I lost my dad, the cat fell ill. It was too much.
I miss that ginger cat more than anything.
Anyway. I really wanted to thank you. Thank you for never being there.
Out shopping when you say you've been at work. I saw the empty Tiffany bag with the receipt for a platinum diamond ring.
Thank you for always being out, spending your money gambling on the lottery.
But I think the time has come.
What will I miss? The burnt pizzas, the overcooked steaks, the under done chips...well...maybe not much.
When I needed you most, you were never there to wipe away my tears.
Thank you though for making me realise what I was worth. More than you.
I also thank my friends that they told me about that tall beautiful lady they saw you with huddled together, giggling over something special, I guess I know who the diamond ring was for.
The way they described her, well, I guess I'm no match.
I don't have time to fight over what is mine and what should have been.
My pillow met with many tears and my therapist was happy at the added extras to her bank account.
Your new found extra curricular activity has me bidding you fare well.
But in all honesty, your dishonesty gives me the perfect opportunity to tell you, I've met someone new.
Thank you for your letter.
All I can simply say is...
What your friends forgot to point out was that the lady I huddled and giggled with was a vet.
We both were ecstatic at having revived our ginger cat, ready to bring her home to you.
Not to mention the gorgeous diamond ring I bought.
That night, I reserved a table for two, to let you know those six lucky numbers I stayed loyal to had won.
Twenty-nine million pounds worth of smiles and dreams fulfilled.
But you never showed up. Guess Your friends got to you first.
Oh and that ring? It was meant to be for that second to last finger on your left hand.
As I asked you to be my wife.
Tough luck for you Jane.
I'm on a cruise ship now with our old ginger cat and that giggling laughing lady wearing your diamond ring.
Sorry that letter was meant for someone else.
Bring the cat along on your way back home will you?
It's pizza, steak and chips for dinner.
Lots and lots of love,