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Fiction, some thoughts and more fiction.

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Thursday, 30 September 2010

What Next?

''My efforts weren't bad'' Katrina said. ''I made 'Britain's Next Top Model'.''

''Katrina, Elle McPherson told you to work on your profile and go on a diet, and you were the first to leave'' Sonia replied.

''Yeah, well, 'X Factor' was alright. I got through to Boot Camp'' Katrina smiled.

''That was because Simon Cowell was speechless because of your off key vocals, he wanted to see what you would do next.''

'' 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire' then?'' Katrina laughed. ''I could have won the Million!''

''You said Candy Floss was a form of tooth cleaner for the £100 question!' Sonia frowned.

''What about 'I'm A Celebrity! Get Me Out Of Here!' then? '' Katrina scowled.

The wig you put on to look like Jordan fell off after you all had to run through the jungle. They certainly got you out of there! And fast!''

'' 'Come Dine With Me?' I cooked the roof off the house in that'' Katina said.

''You scored 0 points hon, the contestants found burnt cat hairs and whiskers in the starter, main and dessert''.

'' 'Extreme Makeover' rebuilt my whole house!'' Katrina cried.

"Katrina, they evicted you since the house was still owned by the council, you hadn't paid the rent and you didn't get permission to redecorate!''

'' 'Jeremy Kyle!' I was a guest on his chat show at least!''

''It was obvious you were lying after you said you were 3 months pregnant then had the baby 10 months later.''

'' 'Four Weddings' then'' Katrina said. ''You know I was the best bride.''

''After hiring the groom and guests to appear at your make believe wedding, and the groom saying 'I don't' no you, most definitely weren't''.

''Ok, ok, 'Britain's Got Talent.' You can't say anything about that.'' Katrina clapped her hands gleefully.

''You set fire to the stage after trying to juggle 35 tennis balls on fire?'' Sonia sighed.

Katrina sat nursing her burnt hands wrapped in gauze.

''I'm thinking of 'The Weakest Link' next''.